Month: April 2025

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Memes 10

? Jelly Presents: MEMES โ€“ Part 10: โ€œPop Culture Is Our Playgroundโ€ ?

1. โ€œTherapy? Nah, We Got Beyoncรฉโ€
?: Joe in a therapy chair.
?๏ธ Therapist: โ€œAnd how does that make you feel?โ€
?๏ธ Joe: โ€œLike Beyoncรฉ in Lemonade after Jay-Z cheated. Powerful, betrayed, but still iconic.โ€
Caption: Who needs CBT when you’ve got Queen B?

2. โ€œThe Real Trinity: Britney, Paris, Lindsayโ€
?: Nelly holding a candlelight vigil with Britney, Paris, and Lindsay in framed photos.
Caption: Before the Kardashians, there were these saints. Pray for 2007.

3. โ€œAI: Artificially Intelligent, Actually Idioticโ€
?: Joe arguing with a ChatGPT chatbot on a laptop.
Bot: โ€œWould you like me to rewrite your screenplay in the style of Wes Anderson?โ€
Joe: โ€œNo, I want it in the style of Fast & Furious meets The Divine Comedy.โ€
Caption: When youโ€™re too real for the algorithm.

4. โ€œNellyโ€™s Guide to Party Etiquetteโ€
?: Nelly at a chaotic Hollywood party.
Caption:

  • Arrive late.
  • Bring vibes, not opinions.
  • If the DJ plays Pitbull unironicallyโ€”leave.
    Subtext: Mr. Worldwide is only acceptable in 2011.

5. โ€œJesus Take The Auxโ€
?: Jelly driving through LA traffic. Joe is crying. Nelly is blasting Enya.
Caption: When youโ€™re emotionally unavailable but spiritually open.

6. โ€œJellyโ€™s Guide to a Healthy Relationshipโ€
?: Split screen. Left: Joe and Nelly laughing at memes. Right: The Kardashians breaking up again.
Caption: Step 1: Be silly. Step 2: Share fries. Step 3: Donโ€™t start a reality show unless youโ€™re ready to be real.

7. โ€œEaster Eggs We Found in the Bibleโ€
?: Joe with a magnifying glass on Revelations.
?: Nelly connecting Kanye lyrics to Isaiah.
Caption: โ€œThe meek shall inherit the earthโ€ = soft girls will run 2025.

8. โ€œElon Musk vs Jelly: Meme War 2030โ€
?: Joe and Nelly in mech suits, launching memes like missiles.
Elon: โ€œDeploy DogeRocket.โ€
Jelly: โ€œRelease the Britney comeback meme.โ€
Caption: In the future, wars are fought with culture.

9. โ€œJesus Is My Influencerโ€
?: Jelly in robes walking on Rodeo Drive.
Nelly: โ€œI turn the other cheek… when the haters talk.โ€
Joe: โ€œAnd I make water into iced matcha.โ€
Caption: #MessiahEnergy

10. โ€œYou Canโ€™t Cancel Jellyโ€
?: Joe and Nelly holding a sign:
? โ€œToo weird to die. Too real to brand.โ€
Caption: Pop cultureโ€™s final boss. See you in Part 11.

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Avoiding Microplastics

ocean microplastics pollution circle concept. vector illustration.

Dr. Luka Kovaฤ, the brilliant yet brooding emergency room physician, takes a deep breath before addressing the camera, his Croatian accent lending a weight of authority to his words.

“Microplastics are everywhereโ€”our water, our food, even in the air we breathe. If you want to minimize your exposure, you must be disciplined. Hereโ€™s what I do:”

  1. Drink filtered water โ€“ “I donโ€™t trust bottled water. Itโ€™s ironic, but many plastic bottles release microplastics into the very water they contain. I use a high-quality water filter at home and carry a stainless-steel bottle.”
  2. Avoid plastic food containers โ€“ “Microwaving food in plastic is a mistake. Heat accelerates the release of microplastics into your food. Use glass, stainless steel, or ceramic whenever possible.”
  3. Eat whole, unprocessed foods โ€“ “Highly processed foods often have more microplastic contamination from packaging and industrial processing. Fresh produce and homemade meals are safer.”
  4. Be mindful of seafood consumption โ€“ “Fish and shellfish, especially those that feed near the ocean surface, are loaded with microplastics. If you eat seafood, choose wisely, and donโ€™t overdo it.”
  5. Choose natural fabrics โ€“ “Polyester and synthetic fibers shed microplastics when washed. Wear cotton, wool, or linen instead. If you must use synthetics, wash them in a special filter bag.”
  6. Reduce overall plastic use โ€“ “Less plastic in your life means less chance for exposure. Avoid plastic cutlery, straws, and cheap plastic kitchenware.”
  7. Vacuum and dust regularly โ€“ “Microplastics settle in household dust. A clean home is a healthier home. Trust me, Iโ€™ve treated too many respiratory issues to ignore this.”

Dr. Kovaฤ leans forward, his gaze intense. “These are small steps, but they add up. In medicine, we always talk about risk reductionโ€”this is no different. Take control where you can. Your body will thank you.”

He sighs, then offers a small, weary smile. “And if all else failsโ€ฆ move to a remote Croatian island. But even there, the plastics wash up on shore. We have nowhere to run. So, we fight.”

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Memes 9

Solid Snake, ever the lone warrior against the hidden dangers of the world, makes a cryptic post on Nelly Furtado’s blog:

**”Nelly, the battlefield has changed, but the war remains the same. You’re being poisoned. Glyphosateโ€”it’s everywhere. In your food, in the water, in the very air you breathe. The suits say it’s safe. But they said the same thing about Agent Orange. About asbestos. About leaded gasoline. Lies, all of it.

You ever hear the story of Moses and the crucified snake? The people were sick, dying from venomous bites. So God told Moses to lift a bronze serpent on a pole. Whoever saw it would live. The truth saved them.

History repeats itself. Look around. The venom is in the crops. In the bread you eat. In the wine you drink. But they donโ€™t want you to see the snake.

Wake up, Nelly. The battlefield isn’t just warzones anymoreโ€”it’s your dinner plate. Fight back.”**

The post sits there, stark and ominous, waiting for Nellyโ€”or whoever’s paying attentionโ€”to see the snake before it’s too late.

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