Pope Gelasius II

[The Apostolic Palace, Rome. A televised Vatican address. The curtains part. The Young Pope appears, stern but glowing. Behind him, a man of deep conviction—Father Sebastian from Haiti—awaits his name.]

Pope Pius XIII (Lenny Belardo):

“The hour is late, and the Church has wandered in the wilderness too long. We need fire, not incense. We need truth, not etiquette. And we need a pope from the people.

From the mountains of Haiti rises a priest of thunder, a shepherd of sorrow, a healer who walks barefoot where angels fear to tread.

I name Father Sebastian of Our Lady of Fatima…
Pope Gelasius the Second.

[Gasps from the College of Cardinals. A few faint. One clutches his rosary like a weapon.]

“And he comes not empty-handed—but with the gold of Revelation 3:18.
Not the gold of bankers, but the gold of prophecy.
Not Wall Street’s gold. God’s gold.
Iridium—pure, untouchable, forged in heaven’s fire and buried in the Haitian earth like a covenant.

And unlike the merchants who hoard, Pope Gelasius II will tithe.
Ten percent of every gram, every ingot, every cosmic crumb of this gold shall go to the poor.
Or perhaps—he will split it. Croatian style. Fifty-fifty. Half to Rome. Half to the streets. No offshore. No tricks. Just bread and medicine.

The time of white lies in white robes is over.
It’s time for black truth in black cassocks.

The Church is no longer for sale.
The Church is back.

Trump Space Force Medicine

INT. SPACE FORCE BRIEFING ROOM – NIGHT

An American flag flaps dramatically. A digital sign reads “KENNEDY SPACE FORCE MEDICINE HQ.” RFK JR. and DONALD TRUMP are facing off, tension thick as Florida humidity. Secret Service on standby. A monitor behind them flashes images of astronauts holding IV bags in zero-G.

TRUMP
Look, folks, I built this. I drained the swamp — completely drained, bone dry — and what did we find under all that slime? Kennedy Space Force Medicine. Mine. The best. Tremendous medicine. Space pills, floating vaccines — all because of me.

RFK JR.
You drained the swamp and found a Kennedy program? That’s like saying you went digging and found Camelot under Mar-a-Lago. This was named after my family — the Kennedy family. My uncle started NASA, my father inspired a generation. And now? Another Kennedy project hijacked.

TRUMP
Hijacked? No no no, Bobby. I liberated it. Your family had it cursed! Marilyn, Chappaquiddick, even the moon landing — all of it, just bad luck. But me? I took the curse off with my executive order and some bleach. It’s called leadership.

RFK JR.
Your bleach can’t cleanse generational tragedy, Donald. This was supposed to be for healing — for the people. Now you’re using it to sell holographic Trump vitamins to billionaires on Mars.

TRUMP
And they’re selling very well, by the way. Vitamin T — T for Trump. Also stands for tremendous. You’re welcome.

RFK JR.
You’re turning the legacy of Camelot into Qamelot. The Kennedy Space Force was about vision. You’re making it a brand.

TRUMP
Everything great is a brand, Bobby. Even America. You’re just jealous the Kennedy curse met the Trump Touch™. Sad!

RFJ Jr. slaps the control panel. A hologram of JFK appears, spinning slowly.

JFK HOLOGRAM
Ask not what your orbital medicine can do for you… ask what you can do for your orbital medicine.

TRUMP
See? Even your uncle agrees with me.

RFK JR.
…This family is cursed.


Who really owns Kennedy Space Force Medicine? The courts are still trying to figure it out, but Elon Musk just tweeted “I’ll buy it.”

Reality is Too Much To Bear

The Young Pope’s Homily on Vaccines, Matthew 24:19, and John 14-16

“Woe to those who are pregnant and to those who are nursing babies in those days!” (Matthew 24:19)

Brothers and sisters, these words of Christ are not to be ignored. He speaks of tribulation, of days when the world will shake, and the weakest will suffer most. The mothers who nurse their children, the unborn who have no voice—who speaks for them? Who protects them in an age where science claims dominion over life itself?

We have seen the world change. Men once bowed before the altar of God; now they kneel before the altar of medicine. We have heard the prophets of the modern age, men in white coats, proclaiming salvation through the needle. They say, “Take this, and you will be free.” But what is freedom if it is purchased at the cost of submission? At the cost of fear?

The Book of Matthew warns us of days when the powerful will dictate who may buy and sell, who may move and live freely. A mark, a seal—have we not seen the foreshadowing? Have we not seen the righteous condemned for their refusal to partake?

And yet, as your Pope, I do not come to wage war against medicine. I do not say, “Reject all things modern.” No, I come as the Vicar of Christ, and what does the Lord say in the Gospel of John?

“And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate to be with you forever—the Spirit of Truth.” (John 14:16-17)

An advocate, a Paraclete, a defender of the weak. That is my role, my duty. Not to follow the world blindly but to ask—where is the truth? Where is the justice for those who question? For those who seek to protect their own children, their own bodies, their own souls?

The Spirit of Truth does not come to soothe the world. He comes to divide, to separate the wheat from the chaff, the truth from the lie. And if the world hates you for this truth, take heart, for it hated Christ first.

In John 16, the Lord warns that they will cast you out of the synagogues, that those who persecute you will think they serve God. Today, are not the faithful cast out of society? Are they not shamed and ridiculed for daring to doubt the wisdom of those who sit in ivory towers?

So I say to you—be wise as serpents and innocent as doves. Do not be deceived. The world will tell you that to question is to sin, but I tell you that to question is to seek. To doubt is not to betray but to walk the road of discernment.

And when they say, “This is for your own good,” ask yourself—who profits? Who gains power? And who suffers? For Christ did not come to enrich the mighty but to lift up the lowly.

May God give you wisdom. May the Spirit of Truth guide you. And may we never forget—our bodies belong to the Lord, not to the world.

Amen.