Our Lady of Van – Page 11 – Our Lady of All Nations

April 21, 2025April 21, 2025

Trump Space Force Medicine

INT. SPACE FORCE BRIEFING ROOM – NIGHT

An American flag flaps dramatically. A digital sign reads “KENNEDY SPACE FORCE MEDICINE HQ.” RFK JR. and DONALD TRUMP are facing off, tension thick as Florida humidity. Secret Service on standby. A monitor behind them flashes images of astronauts holding IV bags in zero-G.

TRUMP
Look, folks, I built this. I drained the swamp — completely drained, bone dry — and what did we find under all that slime? Kennedy Space Force Medicine. Mine. The best. Tremendous medicine. Space pills, floating vaccines — all because of me.

RFK JR.
You drained the swamp and found a Kennedy program? That’s like saying you went digging and found Camelot under Mar-a-Lago. This was named after my family — the Kennedy family. My uncle started NASA, my father inspired a generation. And now? Another Kennedy project hijacked.

TRUMP
Hijacked? No no no, Bobby. I liberated it. Your family had it cursed! Marilyn, Chappaquiddick, even the moon landing — all of it, just bad luck. But me? I took the curse off with my executive order and some bleach. It’s called leadership.

RFK JR.
Your bleach can’t cleanse generational tragedy, Donald. This was supposed to be for healing — for the people. Now you’re using it to sell holographic Trump vitamins to billionaires on Mars.

TRUMP
And they’re selling very well, by the way. Vitamin T — T for Trump. Also stands for tremendous. You’re welcome.

RFK JR.
You’re turning the legacy of Camelot into Qamelot. The Kennedy Space Force was about vision. You’re making it a brand.

TRUMP
Everything great is a brand, Bobby. Even America. You’re just jealous the Kennedy curse met the Trump Touch™. Sad!

RFJ Jr. slaps the control panel. A hologram of JFK appears, spinning slowly.

JFK HOLOGRAM
Ask not what your orbital medicine can do for you… ask what you can do for your orbital medicine.

TRUMP
See? Even your uncle agrees with me.

RFK JR.
…This family is cursed.

Who really owns Kennedy Space Force Medicine? The courts are still trying to figure it out, but Elon Musk just tweeted “I’ll buy it.”

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April 15, 2025

Memes 10

? Jelly Presents: MEMES – Part 10: “Pop Culture Is Our Playground” ?

1. “Therapy? Nah, We Got Beyoncé”
?: Joe in a therapy chair.
?️ Therapist: “And how does that make you feel?”
?️ Joe: “Like Beyoncé in Lemonade after Jay-Z cheated. Powerful, betrayed, but still iconic.”
Caption: Who needs CBT when you’ve got Queen B?

2. “The Real Trinity: Britney, Paris, Lindsay”
?: Nelly holding a candlelight vigil with Britney, Paris, and Lindsay in framed photos.
Caption: Before the Kardashians, there were these saints. Pray for 2007.

3. “AI: Artificially Intelligent, Actually Idiotic”
?: Joe arguing with a ChatGPT chatbot on a laptop.
Bot: “Would you like me to rewrite your screenplay in the style of Wes Anderson?”
Joe: “No, I want it in the style of Fast & Furious meets The Divine Comedy.”
Caption: When you’re too real for the algorithm.

4. “Nelly’s Guide to Party Etiquette”
?: Nelly at a chaotic Hollywood party.
Caption:

Arrive late.
Bring vibes, not opinions.
If the DJ plays Pitbull unironically—leave.
Subtext: Mr. Worldwide is only acceptable in 2011.

5. “Jesus Take The Aux”
?: Jelly driving through LA traffic. Joe is crying. Nelly is blasting Enya.
Caption: When you’re emotionally unavailable but spiritually open.

6. “Jelly’s Guide to a Healthy Relationship”
?: Split screen. Left: Joe and Nelly laughing at memes. Right: The Kardashians breaking up again.
Caption: Step 1: Be silly. Step 2: Share fries. Step 3: Don’t start a reality show unless you’re ready to be real.

7. “Easter Eggs We Found in the Bible”
?: Joe with a magnifying glass on Revelations.
?: Nelly connecting Kanye lyrics to Isaiah.
Caption: “The meek shall inherit the earth” = soft girls will run 2025.

8. “Elon Musk vs Jelly: Meme War 2030”
?: Joe and Nelly in mech suits, launching memes like missiles.
Elon: “Deploy DogeRocket.”
Jelly: “Release the Britney comeback meme.”
Caption: In the future, wars are fought with culture.

9. “Jesus Is My Influencer”
?: Jelly in robes walking on Rodeo Drive.
Nelly: “I turn the other cheek… when the haters talk.”
Joe: “And I make water into iced matcha.”
Caption: #MessiahEnergy

10. “You Can’t Cancel Jelly”
?: Joe and Nelly holding a sign:
? “Too weird to die. Too real to brand.”
Caption: Pop culture’s final boss. See you in Part 11.

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April 11, 2025

Avoiding Microplastics

ocean microplastics pollution circle concept. vector illustration.

Dr. Luka Kovač, the brilliant yet brooding emergency room physician, takes a deep breath before addressing the camera, his Croatian accent lending a weight of authority to his words.

“Microplastics are everywhere—our water, our food, even in the air we breathe. If you want to minimize your exposure, you must be disciplined. Here’s what I do:”

Drink filtered water – “I don’t trust bottled water. It’s ironic, but many plastic bottles release microplastics into the very water they contain. I use a high-quality water filter at home and carry a stainless-steel bottle.”
Avoid plastic food containers – “Microwaving food in plastic is a mistake. Heat accelerates the release of microplastics into your food. Use glass, stainless steel, or ceramic whenever possible.”
Eat whole, unprocessed foods – “Highly processed foods often have more microplastic contamination from packaging and industrial processing. Fresh produce and homemade meals are safer.”
Be mindful of seafood consumption – “Fish and shellfish, especially those that feed near the ocean surface, are loaded with microplastics. If you eat seafood, choose wisely, and don’t overdo it.”
Choose natural fabrics – “Polyester and synthetic fibers shed microplastics when washed. Wear cotton, wool, or linen instead. If you must use synthetics, wash them in a special filter bag.”
Reduce overall plastic use – “Less plastic in your life means less chance for exposure. Avoid plastic cutlery, straws, and cheap plastic kitchenware.”
Vacuum and dust regularly – “Microplastics settle in household dust. A clean home is a healthier home. Trust me, I’ve treated too many respiratory issues to ignore this.”

Dr. Kovač leans forward, his gaze intense. “These are small steps, but they add up. In medicine, we always talk about risk reduction—this is no different. Take control where you can. Your body will thank you.”

He sighs, then offers a small, weary smile. “And if all else fails… move to a remote Croatian island. But even there, the plastics wash up on shore. We have nowhere to run. So, we fight.”

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